How to be a Winner

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howtobeawinner Everyone is trying to win at this game called life. Whether it’s trying to lose a few pounds, becoming a better friend, finding a new career or just getting the front row parking spot at the grocery. We are always trying to win.

I find myself every single day trying to win at something. And then reality sets in. I’m fighting for the unattainable. I’m fighting for perfection.

At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter if I’m just the right shape or how many friends I have on Facebook. What really matters is if I like me. And when I’m in a constant battle to win, the opposite becomes true and I end up hating me.

A few weeks ago, when I started feeling really down on myself and listening to those negative thoughts I did something completely different than I’ve ever done.

I quit! Yes. I quit!

With a tear-stained heart, I said I quit!

I VOW TO QUIT TRYING TO BE THE PERFECT:  writer, speaker, coach, wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, …….

And for the first time in a long time I WON! After quitting, I felt exhilarated. I was unstoppable. I was confident. I was able to believe the complete TRUTH. I was able to live out Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

Quitting gave me a fresh vision for my life.

I no longer have to strive for perfection.

I want to challenge you to QUIT today. In the comments section tell me what you are quitting and your name will be entered to WIN What Happens When Women Say Yes To God Devotional by Lysa TerKeurst. yestogoddevot   To receive my blog, click here to subscribe and get your free gift today! 

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70 thoughts on “How to be a Winner”

  1. I’m quitting eating too much junk food and getting back on my diet to lose those those extra pounds I had gained and then continue to lose till I’m down to 145 pounds. ( a long way to go).

  3. I am going to try my best to quit getting down on myself when the weight isn’t coming off like I would like. Also, to quit getting down on myself when pain in my body seems to affect every single action of the day. I have arthritis in my neck and back and some days are better than others. On the really painful days, it is easy to complain and get mad at myself because there are activities that can’t be done that day. I aim to stop being negative. Wow, that’s a lot of “quitting”. 🙂

  4. I vow to quit trying so hard to be loved and needed. I want God’s love for me to be enough instead of looking to family and friends to fill that need

    • Praying for you to feel God’s love and warmth surrounding your heart today sweet sister. ((hugs)) Thank you for being a part of my blog community!

      • Wow how refreshing is this to read today! I feel like I just never measure up in the world of Godly women. I never have enough confidence in myself bc I always need someone to tell me but that needs to stop. I just need to know I am who God made me and if He wants me to do something He will equip me.

        • Belinda, thank you so much for being honest here! I believe every women in ministry struggles with not being good enough or measuring up. It’s that whole comparison thing that kills us. I struggle with it often. I just want to reassure you that YOU ARE ENOUGH my friend. God has a special plan just for you that only you can do for him. ((love & hugs))) Thank you for being a part of my blog community!!!

  5. I quit! I’m going to quit trying to be all things to all people in my life! I’m just going to pray that God will lead me to be all that He wants me to be & then I know the rest will “fall into place.” Thanks Linda for your blog today!

  6. I quit wrong food choices! Going back to WW ‘s & taking back this part of my life in Jesus’s name!!!! To God be the glory!

  7. I am quitting being a people pleaser and focusing on my audience of One! I am also quitting being a quitter when it comes to eating right and training for a better physical “me.” Week 2 of no processed foods and half marathon training!

    • Megan I am so proud of you and impressed with you!!!! No processed foods and training for a 13.1 miles!! You go girl! I’m ready to lace up my shoes and go for a run now. xoxox

  9. Amen to this absolute Truth: “And when I’m in a constant battle to win, the opposite becomes true and I end up hating me.” Who wins in comparison-perfectionism battle? Satan.
    I AM ENOUGH. I stop trying to be her, or her, or her, or her. In all my quirkiness and imperfections, I am me.

  10. I am going to quit being so hard on myself about everything. I am quitting worry and fear with God’s help, of course. Thanks, Linda for your inspiring blog. I always love reading your posts.

    • Polly, thank you for being a part of my blog community! I love having you here! And I am standing on faith today that you will have a breakthrough in quitting being hard on yourself. (claiming that for me too! 🙂

  12. I quit a long time ago trying to be everything everyone wanted. When I put myself first I can just be me! And I found out I liked the real me better than any of the other me’s everyone else wanted. And God likes the real me the best too! Being yourself will always be perfect….and enough.

  13. I am quitting ” doing” to feel valuable to others, because I have come to realize that this is a form of pride (acceptance), as Lysa talked about in the book. I am loved because I am His, not for what I can do.

  14. Linda, thank you for giving us permission to quit! Also, thank you that we don’t have to do things in our strength but through Christ who strengthens us! I am going to quit trying to make God do things my way and in my time. Have a blessed day!

  16. I am quitting always being “nice” and not saying what is right and true for me. I am quitting allowing myself to be taken advantage of in my relationships and not setting boundaries a bit more with other adults.

  17. I am quitting negative self chatter! I constantly beat myself up over some ridiculous expectations I place on myself! I will quit telling myself that I cant do anything right. I will quit telling myself that I am a failure. I will quit telling myself I am not good enough. I will quit telling myself I am a burden to my husband because I am unable to work because of health issues. I will tell myself to stop feeling guilty about moving away from my family. It’s time I start seeing me that way my creator sees me!

    • Courtney, I believe in you! You are beautiful and perfect exactly the way you are because of Christ love. I’m so excited you are QUITTING!!! You go girl!!! 🙂

  22. I am going to quit running ahead of God. So often I ask God for something or to do something and then run ahead of Him to do it or make it happen myself. He has shown me over and over that it is far better to wait on Him. Please pray for me to be still and know that He is the provider of all things, He doesn’t need my help.

  23. I am trying to quit saying sorry. I say it so often it has become so second nature to me that it is like breathing. I know it is not my fault but I feel bad and wish I could do something to help. I was told that it was a learned behavior of a child of an alcoholic. Yep, I feel so much burden of the world’s problems although I know they are not mine to own. Praying, cuz @ 39, I am trying !!

  24. I QUIT!! Today I’m so deep in the dumps because I feel like I have failed everyone around me in every way. I have even failed God. Im not sure how i got to this point but here I am…. So as of this moment I QUIT! I quit trying to be the perfect wife, daughter, mother, friend and even child of God. He has made me in His image and I need to live in His strength to be all He has created me to be. No, not perfect but perfectly willing to be molded by His hands. I can not tell you how strong God’s words have come through this post. Thank you for being obedient to His calling.

    • Cindy, thank you for being so real with how you are feeling. Isn’t it funny when we QUIT how much freedom we gain? It makes my heart happy to hear that God used my post to bring his word alive to you. I always pray ANYTHING I do will be only for His glory and be a direction reflection of him. Thank you for being a part of my blog community. xoxo

  25. See I even put my reply in the wrong spot way up under someone else’s reply…Oh well I will just laugh and thank God for who I am!

  26. How did you get your pictures on here? I like to see who Im talking with and I will leave mine if I have directions. Thanks

    • Belinda, I used Gravatar.com to upload a picture of myself to show. Hope that works for you! If anyone else uses something different please let us know 🙂

  27. After reading the article I felt a tug at my heart. Oh how I can cosign with the author fighting an unattainable goal: Perfection.
    If it isn’t one thing it’s another, be it losing weight- and keeping it off, or completing all the items on my weekly to do lists. It never fails that I fail. Then, one night the Holy Spirit whispered to me that the Lord “loves and accepts me as I am”—whew, that blew my mind. It’s not that I didn’t already know this, but, it felt good to be validated.
    So with this being said no matter what issues I am / will face, know that I am enough for Jesus, right where I am, no matter where I am. If, improving certain areas of my life is needed, I will call on the Lord, He’ll send the Great Comforter- His Spirit to aid me in all my endeavors.
    Blessings,

  28. I am quitting cussing and getting angry with me and my family. I am also quitting nagging my son and husband. I hate to say this, but I am also quitting moving furniture around since I have a hernia, but husband and son are thrilled.

  30. I don’t know how you do it but your thinking is always on track with what I need to do. I ruined my health to have surgery to lose weight and I’ve gained some of what I lost back and I keep trying to lose what I’ve gained again. I’ve been feeling like a looser to have gone through all that and be right back where I started. I think quitting would be a good idea. It would take the pressure off me. Having ruined my health has caused me to feel bad in other areas of my life. I need to quit and mean it and stay with it. I’ve shut myself off doing my volunteer work and being around friends. I just realized how much perfection I want in my life and that will never be. I have to quit trying to be that perfect person and give my all to God to take care of. Thanks for a healthy perspective on life.

    • Sharon, thank you for being open, honest and real here! I’m proud of you for taking on the challenge to QUIT trying to be perfect. I believe God will move mountains for you now sweet sister. Oh! Just to share my secret on how I’m on track with what you are thinking….it’s completely God. He knows exactly what we need and when we need it. Take it as a personal hug from God, or as my mom says, it’s a Godwink 😉 xoxox

  31. I quit being so serious. I need to lighten up, laugh more, be more spontaneous, have more fun.

  32. I quit worrying about a misstep, and just move forward! Thank you, Linda, for your insight. It really helps, and even reading the other ladies’ “quits” is helpful : ) Said a prayer for all of us.

    • Thank you Carol for being a part of my blog community! It means soooo much to me 🙂 I love you are quitting worrying about your misstep…I’m discovering as I read everyone’s comment there are so many things I need to quit too!

  33. Linda, I love your thoughts! I am right now going to quit my habit of guilt, of beating myself up when I stumble. Jesus is holding my hand and lifting me up to keep going. He is encouraging me to keep my eyes on Him…refocused…#freshvision! As Renee Swope said in her book “A Confident Heart”, I am going to remember to “fail forward”! So, I quit the guilt!

    • Mary, I love that you love my thoughts….cause often times I think there a little crazy! LOL! 🙂 Guilt is a great thing to quit! Jesus wins every time!

  34. This really resonated with me. In the last few weeks I quit bringing up my husbands past transgressions. I forgave him long ago, but was still behaving in a suspicious manner. I quit believing Satans lies that we are back where we were in that dark place.

  36. I am quitting feeling guilty!!!! My 19 year old daughter passed away 2 years ago. (From a heart transplant). I had to make that horrible decision on what to do when she flatlined. It was the hardest decision of my life. To let her go. I had peace at the time but the devil likes to haunt me with that. I know that she is free of pain and she is dancing with Jesus now!! As long as I keep my eyes on Heaven I can do this but when I lose my focus and look at the world things get really ugly. Thank you for your words. It helps to have daily inspiration on this long journey of grief.

  38. I QUIT!!!!!!!!! I am not longer going to watch what I eat and exercise for me……I am going to enjoy what I eat and exercise for the Lord. I am going to be what God wants me to be and do which is “put all my trust in the Lord which means give him everything my weight issues, work issues, family issues etc., I am going to be thankful of everything good and bad because I have the Lord right here with me and I can overcome anything with Christ!!!!!

  39. I am going to quit taking on everyone’s problems and stress and owning them. I am such a “fix it” person. This will challenge me, I believe it is all about letting go and letting God. Thank you for thi message.

  41. I am quitting allowing my kids irresponsibility become my emergency. I thank God for your coaching, the devotionals and every ministry of Proverbs 31. You will never, ever know just how much it helps me in my walk with God.
    Thanks You 🙂

    • Gen, Good Job on quitting!! Thank you for sharing with me how much you are encouraged by my post. My hearts greatest desire is to reach women like you to give them a little encouragement to know they are not alone in life’s struggles. Thank you so much for being a part of my blog community. xoxoxo

  42. I’m working on not being so negative. God has given us so many amazing gifts! It’s time to quit being negative and being more intentional about being grateful for all He has done in my life! I’m also trying to give up pop/soda.

  43. I quit trying to please every one and also letting people use me because they know I will not say no

    In Christ Love
    Angela Taylor

  44. I quit negative self-comments and the picking apart I do about myself. I don’t expect others to be perfect but I have convinced myself they expect it from me. Wrong! Thank you Linda for this post!!

    I will replace the negative with a positive. I will thank God for who I am and the blessings He has provided.

  45. I am quitting the endless inconsistent search to figure out what my purpose is in life. I quit, yes I quit following MY power to answer such a question. I focus on God’s power to direct me and God’s consistent tug to direct my path and tell me clear answers!

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